Christine: "Well, that just about wraps up this episode of You Can't Do That On The Internet..."

*everyone applauds*

Maddy: "You know who we didn't hear from? Lisa."

Christine: "Well, I took your advice..."

Maddy: "You mean you gagged her?! I said to gag Britney and Tipper, not Lisa!"

Christine: "Yeah, but I couldn't pass up the chance to go 24 hours without hearing her voice."

Maddy: "Cute. Really. Ross. Just roll the credits..."

Announcer: "You Can't Do That On The Internet has been a Sleepless In Riverside production! Why would anyone go sleepless there? Does anything go on worth staying up for? Huh? I'm still on? Shit!"

Well, that's it. It's all over!

Before signing off for the night, there is a long list of thank yous to everyone who played a big part in this...

To those who sponsored me - Alfonzo, Rob, KS, Diz, and Elaine: Thank you! Thanks to your generosity, we've raised $119.00 for the Electronic Frontier Foundation!

To those who offered online moral support over the last 24 hours - Alfonzo, KS, Rob, Eric, Libby, Diz, Kris, Sara, Elaine, Kontradiction: Thank you! You played a huge part in helping me make it through these long 24 hours!

A big thank you to Chris, who called last night to check up on me and see how I was going along!

Thank you to Luna and Kamigoroshi for "pimping" by blog! If anyone else did as well, say so and I'll be sure to thank you, too! :)

Thank you to Cat for her great work running this event, to Sara for keeping an eye on me, and to everyone in the Blogathon chatroom for hanging out! It was a pleasure to join you on this ride!

As I can accept sponsors for another 48 hours or so, I will keep the button up for a couple more days... Thank you again, everyone!

And now, I'm off to bed... This will be me for the next 12-15 hours or so...

Except my eyes will be closed.

And my hand won't be between my legs.



Okay, now, Bob.. Say it. Say it!

Bob: "This is Bob Barker, reminding you to help control the pest population. Have a Federline spayed or neutered! GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!"

Goodnight! AND THANK YOU EVERYONE!

Listening to: "Hung Up", "Material Girl" and "Take A Bow" by Her Madgesty

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gagging, Madge Worship, Sinead O'Britney, That's What Friends Are For

Well, for 23 hours, we've listened to Maddy take advantage of free speech to use her share of salty language, discuss all sorts of wild experiences, bullshit and say what's on her mind.

Hopefully everyone out there enjoyed it. I certainly did.

That being said, the First Amendment is not only the first of our Constitutional rights, but in my opinion it's the most important.

Being able to speak freely - whether it's something as goofy as waxing poetic over footwear, whether it's something as meaningful as tell people how you feel, or something as powerful as speaking out against injustice - is the first step toward changing the world.

Why, then, would I devote 24 hours to raise money for the EFF, instead of a general organization that fights to protect free speech?

Because the Internet IS the media for the 21st century. It is how people communicate so often - frequently across the country or even the world. It is how many people anymore get news on demand - what they want and when they want it.

The Powers That Be - both the government and global corporations - fear this. They control the newspapers. They control TV news. But so far, they don't control the Internet...

A classic example of this was the 2000 "Battle In Seattle", where tens of thousands of people took to the streets to protest the World Trade Organization. CNN and so many of the other media puppets went along with the corporate/government party line, claiming police were behaving themselves, no rubber bullets were being fired, and so on.

The problem of course, is none of that was true. And thanks to a person with a camcorder and Interent access, 90 minutes later CNN was forced to retract their story.

Yes, the Internet can be a fun place to meet people, to chat, to play around - even in adult ways. But it is also a powerful tool - one that can be used to share information and news.

In essence, the Internet can become what the print and TV news used to be - a TRUE fourth branch of the government, the one that kept the other three branches in check by exposing the truth.

You know, like they did with Watergate and Vietnam (among other dark periods in recent history) before they were bought out and began to work WITH the government, pushing their agenda...

The EFF's Blue Ribbon campaign alone was enough for me to want to support them. Add in their battles to fight back against the heavy-handed tactics of the RIAA and to hold the government and Ma Bell accountable for Spygate (among other causes they are currently fighting), and it became an even easier choice to devote my time for them this weekend.

Free speech is a very powerful thing. Without it, America isn't America.

And, it doesn't matter if it's the freedom of speech to discuss risque behavior, or the right of a singer to speak her mind about the world around her, or even the right of some Archie Bunker type to spew ignorance. This is simply the most important right we have.

Without it, we can't speak on issues without fear of persecution - or even prosecution.

Without it, the truth is stifled.

Without it, we truly are powerless.

Use it, or lose it.

I hope I gave everyone some laughs, and some fun. But, most of all, I hope I gave everyone some things to think about.

Listening to: "Express Yourself", "Borderline" and "Bedtime Story" by.. Yeah. You all know who. :P

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Free Speech, Madge Worship

Well, New Year's Eve now has company...

Will I do this again next year? You bet! Of course, next year, I will go with my original plan and blog for the Alzheimer's Association.

Why? Because they do need the money. Because it is a cause that is very, VERY important to me... Because as bleak as things look with my father, I have to keep holding out hope for a breakthrough.

And, no matter how big or small, I really want to do something that may make a difference.

I would like to offer a big thank you and heartfelt congratulations to the rest of you out there who've devoted 24 hours of their time to help all these great organizations. The $97,000 and change we've all raised is going to make a difference for the better...

Excuse me while I stand and applaud.

Listening to: "Ray Of Light" and "Get Together" by ME

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Madge Worship, Mi Vida Loca

I had thought KS fell asleep on me. Turns out he was gone for awhile. My bad.

The important thing is, he'll be here for the big finale... :)

Most importantly, I'll be here for the big finale. :P

I must admit to having mixed feelings at this point. On one hand, there is some relief. I know my bed is getting closer.

On the other hand? Well, there's only about an hour and a half left. And I've enjoyed this. I've enjoyed expressing my honest, unique and sometimes flat-out nuts thoughts and feelings. And, I've certainly enjoyed hearing back from all of you out there who are watching.

This has been totally worth it, exhaustion and all. :)

Now, while bouncing around my music collection over the last 22 1/2 hours, there is only one way to be closing this out over the next 90 minutes: In style.

Listening to: "Vogue" and "Disco Inferno/Music Remix" by ME

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Madge Worship, That's What Friends Are For

Tommy Lasorda used to have a great story he'd tell his players to motivate them to finish the job, about a man who fell off a boat 1,000 miles from shore, and swam and swam until he was four yards off shore - then drowned.

Well, we're now four yards off shore, and now is definitely not the to drown...

And, in response to making it this far, I would like to send a message to your friend and mine, Barry Bonds...

See, Barry? You don't need steroids to succeed, dumbass! :P

Listening to: "Blinded By The Light" by Manfred Mann

Labels: BALCO Barry, Blogathon 2006

Well, Alfonzo is awake from his little nap! Yay!

It looks like KS just woke up, too.. Yay! I thought he was going to miss out on me in the ballet boots. :P

I know, I know.. It's nuts to own a pair of boots you can't even walk in. But why not? They're hot. And I imagine I can put them to good use... Somehow.

If not, well, they're still damned hot.

Speaking of hot, unfortunately, it will be damned hot here today... yet again. Thank goodness for air conditioning. How I survived all those years without it is beyond me.

Listening to: "Still Crazy After All These Years" by Paul Simon

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, That's What Friends Are For

Sometimes, it's easy for me to get down in the dumps over things. I won't lie about it. I am overly emotional. When things are good, I cam be euphoric. When they are bad, it feels like I've hit rock bottom - even if I haven't.

I often dwell on the bad things in life. But after 21 incredible hours - of not only finding the stamina and determination to do this, but the support I've seen, I would like to take a few minutes to reflect on what's good in my life....

It's being Madonna! Smoking! Swearing! Wearing kinky clothes! Wearing sexy boots!

Okay, I'm joking. I mean, that's fun and all, but it's not what's so special in my life.

What's special in my life is having people around me who are incredibly supportive and care deeply. More than anything, it's having you wonderful people in my life that helps keep me going when things seem the darkest.

Whether it be something as simple as checking up on me online or over the phone, or being part of my cheering section during this marathon, or being a significant part of my real life, I don't think any of you can imagine how much you do mean to me, and how blessed I am to have people like you in my life.

I am indeed very lucky to have the friends and other loved ones I do. Having you in my life does make it better.

Thank you so much. I love you guys!

*off-stage voice*: You're not getting my Bud Light, Maddy! :P

Listening to: "That's What Friends Are For" by Dionne Warwick

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Madge Worship, Mi Vida Loca, Smoking In The Girls' Room, That's What Friends Are For

Ohh, you just knew I'd use that as a title. :P

Honestly, I do wish we knew the answer to that question, or at least the answer to how to make the world a better place - one built on love, understanding and mutual respect.

Sadly, I don't have that answer. I don't know if anyone does. But if someone does, hopefully they share it with the rest of the world - and soon.

It's just a shame.. It seems for all the advances in technology, the human race itself has made so little progress. And, while I know Rome wasn't built in a day, it would be nice to at least see some progress in humanity in my lifetime.

Miracles do happen. Maybe someday, something will happen that will start to turn things around.

Listening to: "Higher Ground" by Stevie Wonder, "Give Me Love (Give Me Peace On Earth)" by George Harrison

Labels: Blogathon 2006

Well, we're closing in the homestretch. Honestly, a few hours ago, I wasn't sure it was possible..

Interestingly enough, the most recent contest involving posting about fears. I didn't know if they were accept an older post or not. And after two posts of discussing one particular phobia, I decided now was not the time to go for a hat trick. :P

Besides, discussing fears a few hours before bed isn't good for you.. Especially after being awake nearly 24 hours. The idea is to have a nice, long, peaceful sleep...

After all, we're all going to need it.

Maybe they should've asked that question about ten hours ago? :P

Listening to: "Red Red Wine" by UB40, "All Night Long" by Lionel Richie

Labels: Blogathon 2006

One thing I must admit irks me is these bands that have been around forever who are going on with different lead singers than the guys who brought them there.

I mean, no matter how much Steve Augeri sounds like Steve Perry, this is NOT Journey.

Styx without Dennis DeYoung?! You gotta be fucking kidding me!

Chicago has not been the same since Peter Cetera decided they were not a hard habit to break in 1986...

And, well.. Don't even get me started on Van Halen - the day is coming where they'll call me up and ask me to be their lead singer!

But perhaps the most sickening of them all are INXS and Queen. That wasn't a case of firing the lead singer, or him quitting. Freddie Mercury and Michael Hutchence are gone. These bands should've done the honorable thing and called it a career - or at the least, pulled a Run DMC (where the two surviving members will never again record AS "Run DMC").

In those two cases, it not only feels like they're just looking to make money, but that they're shitting all over the memories of their departed lead singers. A shame.

I'll always feel that Led Zeppelin had the right idea: They promised in the beginning it'd always be all four of them, and if anything happened to one of them, it was over.

John Bonham died in 1980, and sure enough, the band called it a career - except for the one night "reunion" for Atlantic's 40th anniversary concert. And, of course, John's son Jason filled in for him on drums...

That was classy.

And, sure, Robert Plant and Jimmy Page have worked together since, but never under the name "Led Zeppelin".

What I wish some of these acts would realize is their success and greatness wasn't just about talent or the music, but the chemistry between the members. And when a key part of the band leaves, that chemistry is gone.

Sad.

Listening to: "Seperate Ways (Worlds Apart)" by Journey, "Come Sail Away" by Styx, "Never Tear Us Apart" by INXS

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Stupid Band Tricks

Well, I've somehow found my third wind, and with five hours to go, I think I'll make it.

Meanwhile, that last post either sent everyone running for the hills, or everyone fell asleep... Which, well.. We'll find out sometime later today. It is today now, right?

And, once again, I find the topic coming back to footwear - namely, the 4" heeled shoes Kris bought today. She also did mention she has problems with her ankles. Maddy's advice? Boots. They give you the nice, high heels, AND ankle support.

Clavin: "Somehow, it just keeps coming back to shoes..."

I'll close out this post by giving a shoutout to everyone participating in the Blogathon who is still going strong after 19 hours! Go! Go! Go!

Listening to: "Wild World" by Maxi Priest, "Baby I Love You're Way/Freebird" by Will To Power

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship

Well, they all seem to be dropping off like flies - not only here, but on Blogathon itself. I mean, it has been over 18 hours, and one hell of a marathon.

Believe me, sleep sounds good. I'd sleep for three days, but I do need to wish my father a happy birthday on Monday - you only get to turn 60 once, after all...

But, in the last five and a half hours, we may as well liven things up. I mean, we've discussed (in no particular order): Boots, Madge, Sherrie, Wonder Woman, the music industry, boots, booze, censorship, phobias, boots, eBay, green slime, gags, bondage, boots, Freddy Krueger, Fred Kruger, South Park, 80's music... and more boots.

Well, maybe discussing the second craziest thing I ever did might grab people's attention.

This a true story, too.. A shame I don't have pictures of this.

One night, back in 1997, Maddy was bored, and went out for a walk. I don't know why, of all places, I decided to kill some time in an adult bookstore, but I did.

Anyway, it just happened to be the night that a couple of adult actresses - Tiffany Mynx and Coral Sands - were there signing autographs.

Apparently, Tiffany and Coral weren't getting enough action (no pun intended), so they shouted for me to come over and get an autograph. Sure enough, I walked over to do so.

Well, Tiffany was in a pair of black suede shoes with 6" heels and platforms, Coral in a pair of 5" white pumps. And yours truly decided to be cute and say "Hey, nice shoes."

Big mistake.

Next thing I know, they each plop a foot up on the table and say "Thanks. Want to touch them? No, really. Go ahead. We went through the trouble to bring them up here for you..."

Well, I did. I mean, why be rude, why?

What can I say but a "touch" wasn't enough. They basically insisted that I go ahead and rub their shoes... And feet.. And... Well, fortunately, that was as high as things went.

Still, I would have to imagine that was one hilarious site: Sweet, innocent (haha!) me giving foot massages to a couple adult actresses.

See, this is why I should stay in my shell more often.. Or come out of it more often. You make the call.

Regardless, that will probably be in the top five craziest things I'll ever do in my life.

I would imagine this little story will either wake everyone up, or send them running for the hills. :P

Listening to: "Modern Love" by David Bowie, "Something About You" by Level 42

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Shoe Worship

Hard to believe we've gone through eighteen hours, but indeed we have. Basically, we've reached third base, now I just need to make it home...

KS has done a good job tonight of unintentionally inspiring topics, and he struck again - by putting up a link to "eBay" by Weird Al...

Mind you, eBay has contributed lots of good things to my collections: Madge posters, Madge T-Shirts, boots... But it goes without saying that things can get a little weird there...

You know, like the people who have claimed to list celebrities' used underwear... Or tissues... Or even things like The Earth, the "Runaway Bride" piece of toast or even Elian Gonzales' networking card...

I don't know what cracks me up more: The fact people list these things, or the fact people bid on them! Wow... And I thought I had too much time on my hands.

For some laughs, check out WhatTheHeck.com's Weird eBay Auction Wherehouse. Great stuff!

Listening to: "eBay" by Weird Al Yankovic

Wow.. It's now July 30 here on the West Coast!

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Madge Collecting, Parodies

Yeah, we've finally reached the seventh inning stretch. A shame Harry Caray is no longer with us, because it'd be great if we could get him to sing for us...

And, no, I'm not going to sing it for you. Put that karaoke machine away, KS!

Besides, I'm not quite drunk enough to now. I've switched to iced tea, and am just catching my second wind now...

I should do something to get the blood flowing a little. Any ideas? Go on.. Share them. :P

Listening to: "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" by Harry Caray

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gone But Not Forgotten

I don't know what amuses me more - the fact I'm probably one of about 17 people left who recalls who Naked Eyes were (much less the fact they reinvented themselves as Clime Fisher in 1988), or that particular mix of "Promises, Promises" I was listening to during the last post.

That remix was produced by Jellybean Benitez, but for some reason, the decision was made not to release the song - either on their album or as a B-side to the single. In fact, it didn't see the light of day for years...

There aren't too many differences between his version, and the one that was all over the radio in 1983. However, the biggest difference is Jellybean's then-girlfriend singing backup vocals on the song...

That girlfriend was none other than a then-unknown Madonna Ciccone.

I do like this version more than the one released in the 1980's (gee, I wonder why), however, I must admit to being a little scared...

I mean, I am trying really hard to be in the Queen's good graces after the dark, ugly 90's. But between possessing that version of "Promises, Promises" with her early vocal work, and a number of songs from Emmy & The Emmys (which was, of course, basically Breakfast Club with Esther Madge on lead vocals), she might be more than a little disgusted at me coming across her early work, before she began her quest to take over the world...

And we've all seen how ripped she is now. She'd kick my ass!

Let's just hope she is, uhh... A bit more amused than pissed off. I mean, I like this early stuff. Really, I do...

Listening to: "Love On The Run" by Emmy & The Emmys, "Back In Time" by Huey Lewis & The News

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Emmy Worship, Madge Worship

I must admit, I got a kick out of Kontradiction's question in response to my last post.

Sadly, no, I've never worked in the fetish industry. I have to admit, that could be cool - especially if I got to take my work home with me...

Especially if the work involved, ohh... Sale and distribution of kick-ass footwear?

No, sadly, I've acquired the majority of my collection on my own. No connection, no free samples.

A shame, too, because if there are two things you can never have too many of, it's kick-ass footwear and Madge T-Shirts. :P

Though, between the two, only the kick-ass boots would go well with the wicked WW costume I posted earlier. A T-Shirt would look weird with it...

Besides, a T-Shirt would hide some of it's, well... assets.

I'm not bad, I'm just draw..... You know, maybe I AM bad after all. :P

Listening to: "Atomic" by Blondie, "Promises, Promises (Jellybean 12" mix)" by Naked Eyes

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Madge Collecting, You're A Wonder

Wow, has it really been 16 hours? Seems like just a couple hours ago I was asking if everyone was fucking ready.

I would like to thank Libby for the very nice post she put up about my efforts on her blog. And, yes, I highly recommend you join in and blog all day (and all of the night) for charity yourself next year. It's great fun, and for a great cause. :)

In fact, I highly recommend this for everyone out there reading. All you need is the stamina to stay up 24 hours, lots of stuff to talk about, and a cause. Smoking, drinking and wearing boots are, of course, optional.

I must admit, much to my surprise, the challenge at this point isn't trying to stay up another eight hours. No, it's trying to go five posts in a row without discussing something erotic or kinky...

Unless, of course, that is what people want to hear. :P

Listening to: "No Sleep 'Til Brooklyn" by the Beastie Boys, "Let It Ride" by Bachman-Turner Overdrive

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship

'Cause a Material party won't stop!

Speaking of parties, I was sitting here, thinking about what to touch on next, and decided to touch on the craziest thing I ever did in public..

No, it wasn't the trip to LA to see my twin sister.

No, it wasn't the trip to LA to attend my first TPIR taping - though I have joked that it was.

No, it wasn't even the karaoke in thigh-high boots.

It was the night I managed to get tied up at a party.

I must've gotten a little too drunk and a little too wild, because a couple people at the party decided I should spend some quality time tied up to a chain-link fence with my mouth taped up.

I couldn't tell you what brought THAT on.. Maybe it was too much alcohol... Or the boots... Or both. Beats me...

Either way, I am sure it was quite amusing. I must admit, if it wasn't for the fact I couldn't do much of anything with my mouth, I probably would've been giggling.

That being said, thank goodness no pictures of THAT exist. :P

And why does this seem to keep winding up on the matter of bondage? I mean, I can't blame my inner Madonna for this one - after all, we all know she's the one who does the tying, not the other way around!

Let Maddy give you all a bit of advice, though: Don't get yourself in that position without comfortable shoes. I mean, as much as I love my boots, my feet were killing me after standing like that for a while.

Listening to: "Rockin' The Paradise" by Styx, "The Warrior" by Scandal

Labels: Barker Worship, Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Gagging, Madge Worship

KS brought up the fact that I'm nowhere near a pace to double my profanity count. I must admit, my statement was partially in jest. I mean, 600+ obscenities is a lot in a day - even for me.

I mean, maybe if I were Tommy Lasorda talking about Dave Kingman, it'd be possible. But Kingman is retired, and there's no way I could eat that must pasta.

Besides, my goal was to express myself and have fun, and hopefully make things fun today. And I've had my share of laughs today, even without cussing every other word.

Of course, that doesn't change the fact there will always be a profanity counter. Why? Because I...

*entire cast and crew together* "Must live up to my name!"

That's right!

I'd like to give a shoutout to Libby, who is now also following along and hanging out with us!

Kris also mentioned in chat that she caught the tail end of something on TV about my other gal, Wonder Woman...

Now, I must admit, as well as the health reasons (haha!), one of the reasons I'm trying to get in better shape is that one of these years, I need a Wonder Woman costume to go with some of those boots. I mean, it's been nearly 25 years since I've had one, sadly...

But, I was thinking... Do I go with something like the one Lynda Carter wore on TV, or perhaps something a little more wicked.... Like this?



That is wicked, yes... But, my black boots would go better with it than Lynda's costume! :P

Listening to: "Shadows Of The Night" by Pat Benatar, the theme to Wonder Woman

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, You're A Wonder

Wow, can you believe it? We're up to post #30... Time sure is flying - even though it's supposed to go by slowly, so slowly, so slowly...

So, we'll take yet another dip into "indecency" and censorship..

And you know what? You know you've made it in life when you know someone who has been the subject of an FCC complaint!

My friend Chris hosts a radio show on WYRM AM in the Virginia area that he calls The Lounge. It's one hour a week on Saturdays, and like Phil Hendrie, he has a crazy cast of characters on the show that he voices himself.

Among them is Jethro Bush, the "long-lost cousin of George W."..

Well, one weekend, he didn't feel like doing the show himself, so he did the entire show as Jethro and played parody sings the entire show - among them, "In My Country There Is Problem" by Borat, AKA Sasha Cohen...

Well, later that week, the station director at WYRM received the following complaint letter:

I was thoroughly disgusted by your disc jockey, Jethrow Bush--I believe that was his name--who repeatedly played a tune that advocated throwing the Jew down the well. This so-called radio work was played on Saturday, July 8th.

Yes, the melody was catchy, but so were Hitler's marching songs.

I would hope that someone will educate Mr. Bush as to what the Federal Communications Commission permits and doesn't permit--even in the name of Freedom of Speech. I will be contacting them soon.

Perhaps he was having a bad hair day. Here's to never hearing him again!

Fortunately, the station director got a laugh out of the letter... And so did I.

Why was it funny? First off, it's the fact that the complainer had the nerve to say the FCC and "free speech" in the same sentence - free speech and FCC go together like Los Angeles air and healthy lungs.

Secondly, Borat is a character portrayed by Sasha Cohen - a JEWISH comedian! The song was satire - it was performed in a country bar and done to try to show that most rednecks will clap and sing along with any song that sounds "country" enough, lyrics be damned.

Chris had a field day the next week - including issuing an "apology", apologizing for such things as the complainer likely being unable to see his penis for the last two years.

Beautiful!

It is indeed an honor to personally know a shock jock who has gotten himself into hot water. Awesome work, Chris!

And Howard Stern better watch out, for there may be a new sheriff in town!

Listening to: "The FCC Song" (again), "MTV Get Off The Air" by the Dead Kennedys

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Fuck You Very Much The FCC, Religious Right Ain't Right

So, as you can tell, no ballets... Yet. :P

No, I've switched to my blue-patent thigh-highs with 5" heels.. Yes, blue! To go with my blacks, and whites, and reds, and golds, and silvers..

Guess that means I need more colors still, huh?

Of course, if I had three legs, I could do the patriotic thing and go red, white and blue - like Bob Barker did with his hair between 1980 and 1987...

Bob: "I had one hell of a night!"

Yes, he certainly did. Of course, this one is still getting started...

The good news, of course, is we're entering a new moon - meaning I don't have to worry about turning into a werewolf by staying up tonight. That's a good thing. I mean, you want to talk about "did I shave my legs for this?" Heh...

Besides, I do prefer cats to dogs. :P

And, it's not like I have any brown boots... :P

So, anyway, I know I'm drinking. Anyone out there doing so as well? Maybe a toast is in order... A toast to insomnia, wildness and bad jokes, perhaps?

Listening to: "Naturally Stoned" by Avant-Garde, "Cracklin' Rose" by Neil Diamond (yes, I listen to Neil Diamond! Aaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeee!)

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship

Of course, the best usage of that line was in Star Trek VI, when Kirk said that in response to Spock saying "You could've been killed". Hahaha...

Well, it's now 7:30 pm here. I'm feeling good, I'm in killer boots (same pair I've been in for some time :P ), and sitting here posting. Tonight would be a great night for clubbing (haven't done that in years) or a party (haven't done that since New Year's).

Now, I have a suggestion.. I have a suggestion. Maddy can't go out and party, so let's all bring the party to Maddy!

Okay, so it was a novel idea. It might've worked for Patricia Bernard. Sadly, though, nobody is in the area, nor could they just "beam over".

Besides, what would everyone bring? :P

I guess that just means we'll have to party online, and Maddy will have to once again live up to her name and get wild, hehehe...

Thank goodness there is no karaoke machine around. :P

Besides, I wouldn't want to torture my friends like that, hahaha..

See, I warned you all I get silly and relaxed when drinking.

Listening to: "Get This Party Started" by Pink, "Where's The Party" by ME

Labels: Barker Worship, Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Star Trekkin'

Recently, to her surprise, Maddy got news that Sherrie Austin was working on another album - after a few false alarms and a two year hiatus.

On one hand, I'm thrilled. Five albums (including her pop album in 1992) just aren't enough... And waiting three years for new material is too long...

On the other hand, the industry has put her through a ringer over the years, as I've discussed before. They've pushed her to the point of nearly walking away more than once. They've frustrated her. They've walked all over her.

So, there is some fear involved, yes. I mean, the industry plays dirty anymore. They don't respect artists nor free thinkers (unless they're too big and powerful for the industry to handle - which, sadly, Sherrie is not).

Sherrie, I have twice offered my services to you, volunteering my time with your Street Team/Fan Squad to help promote you. Well, Maddy is once again offering you her services in a new capacity...

If you need a chain-smoking, boot-wearing, ass-kicking enforcer to protect you from the industry, contact me. I'll do it for free. I have some lovely chrome-toed and heeled boots I'd like to introduce to some chickenshit, corporate-fuck executives who get a rise out of pushing you around.

It'd be my pleasure.

Then after that, we'll go out for some of those hot toddies that you love!

Listening to: "Never Been Kissed" by Sherrie Austin, "Water To The Soul" by Colourhaus

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Stone Cold Sherrie Austin

Sure, KS asks, what's the Blogathon without a little drama? Well, drama is not good for Maddy. Maddy has so much drama she could - and would - gladly sell it.

Besides, if I wanted my wits scared out of me, I'd pay a visit to George W. Bush. Or even worse yet, Freddy Krueger...

Sure, Freddy is funny, and cute - in his own burnt-up, sadistical way... Those one-liners can be fun and all..

But, we've already seen what he's done to one person named Debbie who fears bugs. *shudders*

Okay, so it was kind of funny, since it was fake. And viewed through a TV. And knowing the only Fred Kruger around here is a real estate agent (no joke!).. Think Mr. Kruger gets much businesss?

Anyway, enough of those thoughts... Let's hope we have no more scares for the rest of the night. The idea, after all, is for this Debbie to drink, get wild and have fun - not get freaked out and worried.

Speaking of which, it'd be a good time to grab another drink.. And maybe time for a new pair of boots. Any ideas?

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? :P

Yes, I really am showing my age now... Hah!

Listening to: "Lowdown" by Boz Scaggs (yep, I'm showing my age again) and "Into The Night" by Benny Mardones

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, You Can Check In...

Since there is no upcoming outage (thank god!), then that just leaves celebrating the fact we're at the halfway point of this wild ride.

And, Moose, NOW I am sure you see why I smoke so many cigarettes! :P

Well, we may as well cue up the Bon Jovi at this point - because we are halfway there, and I am sure I will be living on a prayer before the night is over!

Boy, you know I've gotten old, nostalgic and somewhat more tolerant if I'm quoting Bon Jovi. Twenty years ago, I wanted to send them all to Pluto - they were overplayed, overhyped, and I had to put up with way too much of them while waiting for Madge. :P

But, they've grown on me. They're really not bad at all.

Either that, or I am really turning into an old sofie... :P

Listening to: "Living On A Prayer" by Bon Jovi

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Smoking In The Girls' Room

(Edit: Disregard. It's a false alarm. Apparently, the person who warned Cat about the "outage" had read an OLD NOTICE, didn't notice the date, and managed to scare the hell out of everyone...

Can you understand why I smoke at night?! And during the day?! One scare after another!

Well, back to business as usual with the 26th post... Whew.)

The bad news is, our kind, sweet, benevolent friends at Blogger have planned an outrage from 9:00 pm until 11:00 pm tonight.

Lovely. Helluva fucking night for THAT.

I have contacted Cat (the organizer of Blogathon) to see how I should handle this. I mean, while this site is hosted on oracleswar.com (thanks, Rob!), I do post through Blogger...

Unless I hear anything from particular from her, or this scheduled outage gets cancelled/postponed, I am going to personally volunteer to go two extra hours to make up for this.

I mean, when I signed up for this, I promised to make 49 posts over 24 hours. I've done everything I can to hold up that end, and will do so - Blogger be damned.

If Blogger puts me into a position where it takes 26 hours to make those 49 posts - because their damned system goes down for two hours, the only fair thing to do for everyone - Blogathon, the sponsors, the readers, EFF and myself - is to deliver those two hours, even if they are two hours late.

I will keep everyone posted. But if I go silent in three hours, you all know why.

What a fucking night for this. Like it couldn't have waited 10 hours?!

Bones: "The beaurocratic mentality is the only constant in the universe."
Maddy: "No shit. Can you understand why I drink at night?!"

Currently listening to: My air conditioner :/

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Smoking In The Girls' Room

My apologies on being a bit tardy... I was playing around a bit with wiring.

No, not like that!!

In order to be a nice, considerate neighbor, I do most of my music listening on headphones. Cordless headphones. Which means dealing with rechargable batteries.

Well, they only last so long, so I thought I'd find a way to wire them up directly with an AC adapter. They were getting power, but not tuning in...

Rats.

Harry Doyle: "Let's give Maddy credit on that play. At least she didn't shock herself!"

Maddy: "Yeah. I mean, kinky can be fun, but not THAT kind of kinky.".. Whoa. Did I actually just say that?! Oh, my...

Well, I'll just have to switch back to speakers and keep the volume low for the time being...

Though, maybe it's time to buy a charger and some more recharagable batteries. I just never had the need before because I've never really been into, uhhh... massagers.

Ross: "Is it just me, or has this discussion taken a real turn toward the gutter?"
Maddy: "I dunno, but that's a funny question from a guy whose name sounds like raw sewage."

With the halfway point coming up next post, maybe it's time for another boot change? Any ideas? :P

Listening to: Nothing, at the moment... MORE POWER!

Labels: Blogathon 2006

I must admit, as much as I love vodka, and rum, nothing beats some peppermint Schnapp's... Nice and minty, and yet will give you a good buzz.

I know, some people must wonder why I enjoy drinking. Well, you know what? Alcohol affects me like Valium. I don't get angry. I don't get violent. I don't get mean. I get nice and mellow...

Mmmm..... Mellow.

Plus, you never know about me when drinking.. I just might say anything.. I may do anything. And that, after all, is why we're here - to see what crazy thing Madddy might do next?

For instance, there was the moment that I still can't believe happened: The time I got up on stage and SANG karaoke.

I'm not proud of it. Really. Well, maybe a little...

I mean, I walked right up on stage, complete with my outrageous boots... And I sang - sang in public, no less! I don't even sing in my shower!

But to go up and sing "(If You're Not In It For Love) I'm Outta Here!" by Shania Fucking Twain?! What was I thinking?! I deserve a lobotomy like McMurtry for THAT!

See, if I were old and stupid (like today) as opposed to young and stupid (like then), I would've done "Material Girl" or "Borderline" or something.

What is probably the weirdest part of all was being applauded. Must've been the thigh-high boots they were cheering for...

So, we now have 11 hours to go, and I'm feeling pretty good. So you may not know what to expect in the next 13 hours. It could be silly. It could be crazy. Or it could be just plain bad...

And I ain't talking about the Michael Jackson song, either. :P

Listening to: "Bad Girls" by Donna Summer and "Bad Girl" by ME :P

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Madge Worship

That last post - specifically, admitting I was listening to Shatner - sure caught everyone's attention, huh?

What can I say, but I have warped tastes in music. I may be one of the very few people alive who listens to both Madonna and the Dead Kennedys (the REAL DK's, with Jello Biafra).

And I will listen to anything and everything that grabs my attention and strikes a chord with me... I can enjoy oldies. I love classic rock and pop. I can even listen to some country. And while I'm not a huge fan of dance music, well, everyone knows how much I love Madge...

Even with all my ragging on current music, there is the occasional newer song I like - because occasionally even I stumble across a newer song that's well-written, and performed with energy and passion.

Of course, Shatner's music is not exactly performed well - if you consider "not well at all" to be not too well. He almost makes me during my one karaoke experience sound good (and you don't want to know about that... Do you?).

But it's hilarious! "Mr. Tambourine Man" and "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds" are always good for hours of laughter - and what makes them even funnier is at the time he did The Transformed Man, he was dead serious about it!

That Shatner.. What a kook. What a ham. You gotta love him... Well, unless you're George Takei.

Over the years, I've met people who only listen to dance music, because they want rhythm. I've met people who feel music doesn't count unless it has "meaning" (if they only knew there was more to songs like "Deeper And Deeper" and "Secret" than just "sex"). I've met people who can only listen to "angry" music and feel like anything else is "weak".

But music has always meant a lot of things to me. I enjoy songs that can make me think. I enjoy songs that can make me smile. I enjoy songs that can make me think back. I enjoy songs with energy that get me pumped up.

And, yes Mr. Shatner, I enjoy songs that can make me laugh.

Thanks for the laughter, Bill. So when are we getting together for some Saurian brandy?

Listening to: "I Lost On Jeopardy" by Weird Al Yankovic, "Windows 95 Sucks" by Bob Rivers

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Shatner On Acid, Stupid Band Tricks

Well, we are nearing the halfway point of this little extravaganza.. Just got done with dinner (Mmmm... More Subway), and now it's time go back to unwinding, posting, and listening to music.

I must admit, the older I get, the older my musical tastes get. I don't get most of today's popular acts. Hell, I don't even know who half of these fucking guys are...

I started losing interest around the time MTV - excuse me, mTV - started playing less music. Maybe it was looking around and seeing so many "popular" acts who would be here today, gone tomorrow.

What can I say but we have become a disposable society. Disposable celebrities. Disposable electronics. Disposable cars (can we say "leases"?)

They sure don't make things like they used to...

A topic I regularly discuss with a couple of my friends is the future of the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame. After 2009 (Her Madgesty), who gets in? Probably Nirvana... Anyone else, though?

I tell you, we're facing some real lean years with the Hall after January 2009. Just goes to show what a sorry state our music industry is in. :/

Time for another drink, and a nice Capri 120...

Christine: I've never seen anyone smoke so many cigarettes!
Maddy: Well, what else am I supposed to do with all of them?!

Listening to: "Has Been" and "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds" by William Shatner

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Madge Worship, Shatner On Acid, Smoking In The Girls' Room

Well, Mr. 74 got himself back in the press this week - mainly because some people can't tell the difference between a serious post, and a spoof.

Last week, Ken Jennings made a post on his blog, giving all sorts of outrageous, over-the-top solutions to things Jeopardy! viewers complain about, and even made some outlandish statements like suggesting Alex Trebek was killed in a fiery crash and replaced by the Trebektron 4000.

I mean, honestly. The post comes across as the kind of thing I'd post - wacky, outrageous and so far out in left field that even one of Mark McGwire's steroid-fueled home runs couldn't reach it...

But what has floored me has been the number of people (including some reporters and columnists) who have assumed this post was serious and have blasted Ken for being "ungrateful" and "disrespectful".

C'mon, people. Ken's post is about as serious as me blasting the media for how they treat me (as opposed to "me", AKA Esther Madge). When did people forget how to tell the difference between serious commentary and satire?

This whole fiasco brings to mind the time Catherine Crier (of Court TV) stuck her foot in her mouth a few years ago...

Catherine reported live on Court TV about Steven Bosell suing the Department Of Homeland Security shortly after the whole "We have a threat of a biological attack. Use duct tape and plastic sheeting to seal your doors and windows if there is an attack."

(Mmmm... Duct tape. Wait, did I just say that? Shit. Here I go again... :P)

Anyway, according to the lawsuit, Bosell wrapped his genitals up in duct tape, then experienced excrutiating pain when he removed the tape. He then decided to sue the DHS for infliction of emotional distress.

There's just one little problem... The lawsuit did't exist.

In fact, Steven Bosell doesn't even fucking exist.

Bosell is a character on Phil Hendrie's radio show, voiced by Hendrie himself. He was created to spoof all these outrageous lawsuits, and among other "cases", he's also "sued" Justin Timberlake and Janet Jackson for the Super Bowl Boobiegate, and Debbie Gibson for posing in Playboy.

What's even more pathetic is that my friend Sydney has been a long-time fan of Hendrie's show, and had connections to Court TV. When he found out they were going to run the story, he called and warned them not to.

They didn't listen.

I swear, the media has their heads up their asses sometimes. And people wonder why I refuse to jump everytime the media reports something about Esther Madge? Easy: They can't tell when Ken Jennings is being a smart-ass, and they can't take a few minutes to figure out whether Steven Bosell's "lawsuit" (or even Bosell himself) really exist.

That deserves a fucking sheesh.

Listening to: "Axel F" by Harold Faltermeyer, "Take It To The Limit" by The Eagles

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Parodies, Presstitutes, The Stormin' Mormon

Hopefully Alfonzo is on his way back in. It seems his key isn't working on the front door for some reason.

All I can say in response to that is one of my grandfather's favorite quotes: Did you try kicking it? I have some boots that should teach it a lesson... :P

Actually, no, I don't kick things as much in real life as I do "online". That's a good way to fuck up your feet. And your footwear. Can't be having that now...

KS just asked a whopper of a question. After I told him I'm drinking coke and vodka in one hand and water in the other (as in taking a sip, putting it down, taking a sip from the other, putting that down), he asked if I was typing with my pinkies.

No, I'm not. I'm also not typing with my nose, my feet, nor do I have more than four appendages. :P Cute.

No, I won't pick on you too bad.. Yet.

Well, nine hours down, and fifteen to go... I'm off to mix another drink, though I'll nurse that one too - as I haven't eaten dinner yet.

Listening to: "I'm Still Standing" by Elton John, "Crazy On You" by Heart

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, That's What Friends Are For

Okay, so honestly, only 15 1/2 hours to go.. Heh...

Well, we'll get back on the topic of people expressing themselves in shocking and less-than-pleasant ways - namely, the controversial and insensetive comments made last month by White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen.

For those not familiar with Guillen or his latest controversy, he referred to a columnist as a "fucking *insert crude slang for a homosexual here*".

I don't know which attempt at an "apology" was worse: The first - where he claimed he didn't know what that meant here, because it "doesn't mean the same thing" in his native Venezuela... Or the second.

Yes, Mr. Sensetive himself tried to claim he wasn't really homophobic, because he "has gay friends", "follows the WNBA", "supports the Gay Games"... And, get this: Because he recently attended a Madonna concert!

Supporting free speech means supporting the rights of people to say things you DON'T want to hear, including homophobic slurs. That being said, it truly is a shame here in 2006 that bigotry of any form still exists, and people feel the need to throw THAT f-word around without a care in the world.

Of course, the media continues to have a field day with this... DJ Gallo, a sports satirist, said this of Guillen and the White Sox in his prediction of how the second half of the season will go:

"And Guillen must somehow keep his focus on baseball, even though the Gay Games have opened in Chicago, the WNBA season is in full gear and Madonna is on tour."

That being said, I can't picture Esther Madge being one bit amused by being dragged into this. I know I wouldn't be if I were her.. Wait, I am her.

Well, then, I'm not one bit amused...

I guess while shit like what Guillen and others like him spew pisses me off, I defend their right to say it because free speech doesn't exist as long as there are people who can't speak their minds - no matter how offensive, ignorant and hateful it is.

That is, as long as they stick to saying such bullshit and refrain from acting upon it.

Besides, much like with how we saw Archie Bunker evolve over 13 years on TV, it's my hope that discussing such things - even in such crude, ignorant ways - will eventually lead to understanding.

Until then, Ozzie, keep my name out of your fucking shit. The media puts me through enough without you adding onto it. :P

Listening to: "It's Not Over ('Til It's Over)" by Starship, "Sorry" by ME

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Madge Worship

I always knew I could count on KS to come up with a suggestion on the boots. He's pretty warped like that - in a good way, of course...

Anyway, I'll be taking his suggestion much later, when I am too tired to even think about walking, since ballet boots are not made for walking.

Heck, they aren't made for standing, either! But, they are quite hot, if you ask me... Maybe I should live up to my name, and hire some people to carry me around in them?

What can I say but it's the shoes (boots?)? It's gotta be the shoes!

I guess it's kind of hard to explain my thing for outrageous footwear. Sure, to a degree, it's Julia Roberts' fault ("Wow, awesome boots! I want a pair" - 20 pairs ago). But to a large degree, it was my mother.

She stood 5'11" and wore her share of 4" and 5" heels. I don't know if she had a thing for them, too. I don't know if she liked being 6'3" or 6'4" in them and standing over most guys. Maybe a bit of both... But I do recall seeing her (when I stood to her knees) and thinking "Yeah, I want to wear shoes like that when I grow up."

I guess I kind of related that with her, and that was where my fascination started with them...

Of course, I've since taken it to a level that might even shock her if she was here to see it, hehe...

But, as we know: I live to shock people. I must live up to my name... :P

Listening to: "Hungry Like The Wolf" by Duran Duran, "Hey Nineteen" by Steely Dan

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Gone But Not Forgotten, That's What Friends Are For

Uh oh.. She's going to get going on gagging and tying again.

Naw, she isn't. I'm teasing. But, I am not teasing when I say it is so nice to know there are people out there following along and keeping an eye on me. I do appreciate the comments, and really appreciate the phone calls from Alfonzo. :)

I'd also like to give a shoutout to KS, who finally woke up. Hello, sleepy-head! :P

We're not quite 1/3 down, so there's another 16 1/2 of fun coming up!

Christine: "I knew it. She may claim to be Madonna, but she's really re-invented herself as Lisa!"

Maddy: "Aaaaaaaahhh heard that!"

Meanwhile, I'll pour myself a vodka and coke (Mmmmm....), unwind a bit, and get ready for even more fun! :)

Listening to: "Young Americans" and "Starman" by David Bowie

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gagging, That's What Friends Are For

Before the show finally jumped the shark this season, this was one of the few current shows on television I enjoyed. Most of the time, if I need to do something about my TV fix, I'll tune into the classics - either flip over to TV Land or GSN, or pop in some of my collection (which, at the moment, consists of plenty of Quantum Leap, Star Trek, The Greatest American Hero and of course Wonder Woman).

South Park, before it became obsessed with fighting a war with $cientology, used to be one of the gutsiest, most clever, most creative shows on TV. Matt and Trey had balls - whether it was taking on the 2000 election, Gary Condit, or even the Super Bowl halftime fiasco from a couple years ago.

Sadly, those days appear to be over. They can't even be bothered to kill Kenny most of the time - which was one of the most appealing things about the show. It's just not the same when we go weeks at a time with Kenny not dying - much less hardly saying anything.

But, maybe there is hope. Maybe there is a way to breathe new life into the show...

Maybe this picture, which I found on a MySpace profile, is the solution to everything...



Of course, Kenny might not like it too much. Kenny, as we know, doesn't think too much of me - calling me an "anorexic old whore" and saying I should "go fuck myself" among other mean-spirited things.

*Maddy flicks her cigarette at Kenny, watches his parka catch fire as he screams and burns to death*

Stan: OH MY GOD! MADONNA KILLED KENNY!
Kyle: YOU BASTARD!
Jay Leno: "Oh, who cares?! He used to die every damned episode!"
Maddy: "You will respect my authoritah!"
Ross: "Cut. Cut! Haven't we already done this before?"
Maddy: "Yeah... Just like all those locker jokes!"

Besides, he'll be back. He always comes back. :P

Listening to: "The Flame" by Cheap Trick, "In The Ghetto" by Eric Cartman and Elvis Presley

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Madge Worship, Smoking In The Girls' Room, South Park, They Killed Kenny

Is it just me, or have some of my recent posts taken on a sado-mascochistic tone lately? Taping Tipper's mouth with a Tipper Sticker, gagging Britney to keep her from singing... Heh.

Well, I do have a warped sense of humor and warped mine, and you can rest assured it'll get worse over the next 17 1/2 hours. :P Of course, I am sure that is exactly what everyone is waiting for...

Well, I do need to pace myself, at least here in the early stages. :P

I do have to admit, Esther Madge has the right idea - shocking people can be fun. Really. She would be nowhere near as much fun if she didn't do wild things to get a rise out of people!

And, well, I must live up to my name, after all.

A shame, though, that I didn't know what I know now back when I was in high school (or even junior high), or think the same way. I could've made things more interesting with pranks and outlandish behavior.

But, then again: I really wouldn't want to relive school again. That's one part of my past that can stay there!

In the meantime, I'll try to go three posts without talk of sealing someone's mouth. :P

Listening to: "Feels So Good" by Chuck Mangione

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gagging

Hard to believe we're 25% of the way there...

I admit it, I have a certain fondness for the number 13. Probably because of all the happy memories of the 1999 Rams and Kurt Warner.

Believe me, I was more than a little shocked to find out it was also Esther Madge's favorite number. Then again, as much as she likes doing things to be different and surprise people, it shouldn't be THAT much of a shock...

Mind you, while the "hip hop mix" of "Justify My Love" (which I played while typing my last post) isn't my favorite mix of the song, I absolutely love the ending of it, where Madge ends the track by saying "Fuck me!". Priceless!

I know, it's weird, but few things amuse me as much as hear Madge say "fuck"... Hence my choice of Windows startup sounds, hehe...

I finally picked a pair of boots to switch to. I'm now in my 4 1/2" heeled black-patent thigh-highs with chains and buckles. Cute. I should wear them to a TPIR someday. I'm sure they'd blend in well with the big wheel, no? Hahaha...

Thank goodness for a/c, or it would not be very comfortable in these things right now. Thank goodness for a/c, period. It's been horrible here this summer...

Maybe I should go out and try doing a rain dance in them?

Currently listening to: "Saturday In The Park" by Chicago, "These Boots Were Made For Walkin'" by Nancy Sinatra

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Boot Worship, Madge Worship, Ram Pride

You know, despite the attempts during the 2000 campaign to fool us into thinking Tipper Gore was some hip, happening mom, some of us haven't forgotten her witch hunt - nor the PMRC.

Tipper, of course, isn't just responsible for those dreaded stickers (one of which mars the cover to my "Justify My Love" single, of course), but for trying to bust the 2 Live Crew, and helping to get Jello Biafra put on trial over Dead Kennedys' Frankenchrist album.

I admit it. I voted for Nader in 2000. And the biggest reason? Mary Elizabeth "Tipper" Gore. The idea of HER as a First Lady scares me 1,000,000 more times than Nancy Reagan ever did!

It truly disgusts and frightens me to think that the wife of an American politician - a "DEMOCRAT" no less - could be so gung-ho about censorship and trying to ban songs she deems "offensive".

Here's a thought, Tipper: If you're so concerned about what your kids might want to listen to, try being a mother instead of paling around with Phyllis Schlaffey and Susan Baker.

What disgusted me was not only the iron-fisted manner in which she tried to pull this off, but her absolute cluelessness...

In 1985, the PMRC released their "Filthy Fifteen", a list of 15 songs the PMRC flagged for "occult", "sex", "masturbation" and "violence"...

It's bad enough that she flagged "We're Not Going To Take It" by Twisted Sister for "violence" (when the song is clearly anti-conformity), but get this.... They flagged "Dress You Up" for "sexual content"!

You've got to be fucking kidding me.

Again, I say parents need to be the judge of what their kids can and cannot listen to, not the government. If a parent doesn't want their kid to listen to Erotica or Nasty As They Want To Be, fine. But why do we need Big Brother Government to decide for us?

Tipper and her thugs wanted a full-blown ratings system. They had to settle for their stickers...

Personally, I think the only place a Tipper Sticker would look good is across Mrs. Gore's fucking mouth.

Sometimes, it just floors me that things have spiraled that out of control here.

Currently listening to: "Moral Majority" by the Dead Kennedys, "Justify My Love (hip hop mix) and "Dress You Up" by Esther Madge

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gagging, Madge Worship, Religious Right Ain't Right

Wow, it's hard to believe five hours are already in the books. I just had a quick lunch (Mmmmm... Subway.), and am now settling back into my routine.

I also noticed that my profanity count for the day is a paltry 26. 26?! I said "fuck" alone more times than that in my post about Sherrie's career and battles with the evil music industry last year!

C'mon, Maddy, get it together!

A friend of mine told me just a bit ago that the government is closing NORAD. The irony...

Back when I tried to get my first modem, back in 1988 (a blazing fast 300 baud), my grandfather kept trying to nix it. "She's going to end up hacking into defense computers, like in War Games!"

Yeah, fucking right! My knowledge of "hacking" couldn't get me into the landlord's computer, much less the military's defense system - nor would I want to.

I loved my grandfather, but I stilll roll my eyes over that one... I mean, good grief. It's beliefs like that, and slanted news coverage from the pressitutes that causes so much paranoia over the Internet.

Of course, those were the good ol' days of being online. Things were more localized. And you didn't have constant scare stories in the press about evil chatrooms or big bad fucking MySpace.

I really do miss those days sometimes. Far less bullshit.

Don't get me wrong. There are plenty of advantages to the Internet we enjoy today. There are just some things I miss from the Early Days.

Besides, I was far less crazy back then. :P

Currently listening to: "Yesterday" by The Beatles, "Too Much Time On My Hands" by Styx

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Gone But Not Forgotten, Mi Vida Loca, Presstitutes

Sadly, between chatting and coming up with posts, I haven't been able to do any serious browsing so far. But I would like to share a couple of blogs I've encoutered so far from fellow Blogathonners...

The first is Kamigoroshi's blog Footsteps In The Mirror. He is blogging for cancer research, and is posting a number of unusual pictures, challenging readers to guess what they are. Keep up the great work, and thank you for plugging me!

The second is Luna's blog, A Walk In The Evening Garden. She is blogging for the Institute For 21st Century Relationships, and her blog centers around discussion of BDSM (how fitting, considering who I reinvented myself as!)

Keep up the great work, both of you! :)

Luna's blog leads me to another topic that I ponder quite a bit, and that's people obsessions with other people's sex lives.

I mean, we have a government more obsessed with banning gay marriage than improving this country. We have communities where gay sex and BDSM is considered illegal.

Who in the hell gave the government and law enforcement the right to get into our business?!

My belief on sexual activies is the same as my beliefs on nearly everything else: As long as it's consentual and doesn't harm people, I have no problem with it and feel it should be LEGAL.

As long as people don't go around kidnapping innocent people to engage in S&M, or trying to get it on with kids or animals, I have no problem with it as long as the people participating in it agree with what's happening and enjoy it.

I could care less if two gay men want to have sex, or there's an orgy with 15 guys and 3 girls, or a man and a woman enjoy cuffs and paddles. They're adults, they're choosing to take part in such activities, and they should have the right to enjoy their kinks or lifestyle.

And, let's face it, we all have our kinks - some are just a little less vanilla than others.

I mean, in a truly free country, shouldn't people be allowed to participte in the consentual sexual activies and lifestyles they enjoy without persecution or harassment from the government or law enforcement?

That's my two cents on the matter. More power to those who are in love with same-sex partners. More power to those who enjoy things kinky.

Besides, you must admit, there is one useful thing to bondage equipment...

Christine: "Oh, yeah. Sure. What's that?"

Maddy: "This..."

Britney: "Hit me baby one mor... MMMPH! MMMMPPPHHHH! MMMMMMMPPPPPPHHHHH!!!!" *Maddy stuffs a gag into Britney's mouth*

Maddy: "See? Isn't that better?!"

Ross: "You're going to get us kicked off the air!"

Currently listening to: "Hey Jude" by The Beatles, "Violent Love" by Oingo Boingo
Boots: Still the 4" heeled knee-highs, as I've yet to receive any suggestions :P

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Free Speech, Gagging, Religious Right Ain't Right, Sinead O'Britney

I must give a shout out to Alfonzo, who just called me in shock after realizing that my gal Sherrie Austin is indeed none other than Sherrie Krenn, who played Pippa during the last season of The Facts Of Life.

I had actually discovered it a few months after I got into Sherrie in 1998. I of course went out of my way to get ahold of all the episodes she appered in (not too many, sadly). And maybe I'm biased, but I thought Pippa was hilarious and adorable. I can't see why most FoL fans dislike her. :/

Thank you, Alfonzo. I'm glad I'm not the only Pippa fan out there!

Of course, everyone who has visited this blog recent has seen Wonder Madge. But, she was hardly my first Photostop job, and hardly even the first one I did of Wonder Woman...

In 1999, Maddy once again sat at her computer, drunk and bored, and after two hours of playing around with PhotoDeluxe 2 (that gives you an idea just how long I've been doing this!), she came up with this:



I know. I'm terrible! :P

Currently listening to: "Wild Ride", "Favorite Waste Of Time", and "Lucky In Love" by Sherrie Austin

Labels: Blogathon 2006, Stone Cold Sherrie Austin, That's What Friends Are For, You're A Wonder

Well, after three Kahlua and coffees, time to switch to a little water. After all, I don't want to overload my stomach just yet. I do need to eat along the way, after all...

Besides, drinking water while drinking alcohol helps prevent you from getting dehydrated and hung over.

I like "Hung Up", not "hung over"... :P

Bob: "There's nothing worse than a drunk Material Girl!"

Maddy: "This coming from someone who drinks at night because of dumb contestants... That'd be like Madge lecturing me on swearing!"

Besides, won't it be fun later to watch me wobble around in very high heels while drunk? Well, sadly, you can't watch since I don't have a webcam. But I'll have fun talking about it, hehehe...

Speaking of which, maybe I should let the fine, generous sponsors pick which pairs I spend the next 20 1/2 hours in? Yeah, there we go...

First sponsor to comment and pick a pair, that pair gets worn.

Again, NEVER let it be said that Maddy doesn't go out of her way to please her fans!

Current music: "Dead Man's Party" by Oingo Boingo, "Hung Up" by ME

Labels: Barker Worship, Blogathon 2006, Boo